There are some things you can’t learn even from the best personals website around. One of them is what to do to keep a girl once you’ve found her. Sure there are plenty of guides on how to impress her on the first date, what to buy her when looking for gifts, or how to deal with certain aspects of your relationship that spring up. Some tips for genuinely appealing to that part of her that makes her heart flutter when you walk in the door, though, that’s a little bit harder. It’s not just one thing or how to handle a specific situation. That is something you build with the little things you do with and for her. So settle in and take some notes to learn a thing or two about what gives her butterflies in the stomach when she’s talking about you.

Bring Something with You if You’re Going to Her Place

We aren’t talking about a gift. If she needs help with something and it involves going to her place, chances are you’ll be working for a bit. Something along the lines of helping to put something together, move things around, or fix something up. These are the mundane situations that she will really appreciate having someone to help her through. These are, also, the things women tend to remember if you never do. So not only is agreeing and showing up important, your timing and what you bring along is as well.

Of course, in many of these scenarios, there is an exchange going on. Usually, the agreement is along the lines of if you come over and help, she’ll provide the food for the evening. That’s all well and good, but if you want to be remembered for going the extra mile when she didn’t ask for the moon, try bringing over something more along the lines of cute or charming.

If she’s offered food in compensation, bring dessert. Double points for making it yourself, of course. Women love it when guys show a little initiative coupled with a bit of domestic flare. It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant. Bake a cake, or make some brownies. Either way, it will be something you made for her which won’t go to waste or sit neglected and forgotten on a shelf full of knick-knacks. If you think you’ll be working for a long time, bring over a case of beer or other similar beverage. Just make sure it’s something she likes and would want to keep the rest of because you will be leaving it there. It’s for her, after all.

Sometimes, such as in the case of helping her fix up a room or if she’s full out moving, bringing something along for the room when you’re done or to make it feel a bit more like home will do the trick. Something as simple as a single rose in a thin vase is more than enough to hit her charm buttons for the day. It doesn’t take much, just a little forethought and enthusiasm.

Know What You’re Going to Need, and Offer to Pick Some of it Up

One of the keys to success has always been research. that’s just as true for relationships as it is anything else. While spontaneity definitely has its moments, for the most part just knowing what you’re getting yourself into is going to make the entire experience a lot better for everyone involved. So when she asks for help, don’t expect she’s going to give you the same amount of information you’d need to know for the task as you can expect from, say, for other activities. Even the best personals website suggests talking with a potential hook up before you meet to make sure you’re both on the same page. The same can be said of any task she needs help doing.

Ask her not only about what needs to be done but how she plans to do it. Not only does this help avoid confusion, but it shows her that you’re actually interested in helping and getting things right. That translates to an interest in her and wins you some good points when it comes to staying on her good side and giving a better impression overall.

More to the point, however: everyone does things differently. If you actually take a moment to discuss what she knows of what she’s trying to do, you can figure out if she is looking for expertise, someone to help her figure things out, or just needs a little muscle and already knows what she’s done. This, in turn, puts you in a better position to come out looking better in the end.

If she’s looking for help or expertise, you’ve hit the jackpot. Even if you don’t have experience with what she needs to do, this is a great time to make a good impression that will last. Between friends, family, store clerks and the Internet, someone has to have some idea of what you need to do in order to accomplish what she wants. Looking into it on your own time would be enough to show you aren’t just grudgingly helping her, but rather invested in making sure it turns out right.

We’re going to take that a step further, however, and make sure she has all the tools she needs for the job. If it’s just simple things you already have lying around a toolbox somewhere, just bring what you have over when you show up and make sure to mention that you wanted to make sure you had the right stuff for the job.

Otherwise, it’s usually a good idea to call her up and explain what you found out she will need to get everything done the way she wants. Then, just offering to bring anything she doesn’t have over with you is what will really make the difference between being the guy that helped her and drifting back to the best personals website after a couple of months.

Cover Snacks, Drinks or Dinner

As we mentioned earlier, some of the simplest things to do don’t involve the project itself at all. The fact of the matter is whether you’re helping her fix something, set something up, or move things around, at some point, you will want something to drink, eat or just munch on. Take the initiative to bring something along. If you are ever in doubt, or unsure if food was implied, bringing drinks and a snack are a safe bet. That way if she was planning on a meal, you just brought something to cover the in-between. If she wasn’t, she’ll be a little more than pleasantly surprised you were so thoughtful.

If we had to recommend anything as far as food goes, however, it’s sticking with something like cupcakes or some other sort of dessert you can reasonably make yourself. The reason for this is that desserts and baked goods, in particular, tend to elicit positive, hearth and home feelings and if you’re in it for the long haul, that’s what you want her to associate with you.