When you’re trying to meet women on a dating site you have to assume that everyone around you has been on a thousand first dates. First dates are exactly what online dating is known for. It can be really tough to try to think of good date ideas when you’ve already been on so many dates and so has the person you’re going out with. There’s a tendency to get a little bit jaded and a little bit lazy. That’s not the way to get women to fall into your bed on the first date, and not getting laid can lead you to come on too strong and scare off some otherwise perfectly good dates.

Thankfully, there are a few good tricks out there that let you put a spin on a classic first date so that you can easily boost the intimacy of the occasion and get her in your bed ASAP.

Get Coffee and Talk about Forbidden Things

A review of top online site questions shows that just about everyone agrees: no discussion of politics or religion on a first date. The waters are just too fraught with peril to risk a new relationship, says the conventional wisdom. You don’t want to scare her off, and you also don’t want to find out something about her that’s going to make it impossible for the relationship to progress. However, breaking the rules together and talking about very important things can really foster a sense of intimacy between you. She’s going to feel like you two really know each other, and that connection is something that women look for before they have casual sex. It’s one way to weed out guys so they can sleep around and still be able to justify it as having a connection.

To pull this off, you have to get her to agree to some ground rules. First of all, this is to thumb your nose at these dating “rules” that everyone agreed on. Make this a secret the two of you are going to share. After that, agree that no matter what is said, you’re going to talk it out like reasonable people and that no matter what you say neither of you will leave until the hour is up. Once she agrees to all of that, get her to open up about something first. Then, just match your responses to hers. Don’t parrot her views, just mostly agree and occasionally disagree rather mildly. Don’t let it get heated, and don’t take anything she says personally. In the end, this is going to be a lively conversation and will have brought you closer together, no matter how different your opinions might be.

Get Drinks in a Hotel Bar

If you want to make it really, really easy to go to bed with you build a bar in your garage. Short of doing that, head to a hotel bar. These places are often fancy, packed with traveling strangers, and you have a bed waiting for you upstairs if at any point the night should turn amorous. Plus, because these places are fancy, it’s easy to get her to really put an effort in. A lot of women on sites like Match.com.au want a more casual first date these days, but it’s better if you can get her to put a lot of effort into getting ready for you. It makes her less likely to want to leave early because she wants to make all the work she did looking hot worth it. Plus, then she looks hot.

Go to the Movie Before Dinner

Poor conversation is going to kill your chances to get her into bed. An online review of the top dating site turnoffs shows that a boring dinner conversation is something women dread the most. If you’re not a sparkling conversationalist, don’t worry. All you have to do is switch up the order off your date. Start out with a movie, where you really don’t need to talk, and after that, you can head to dinner and… drumroll… talk about the movie! A lively conversation and apt critique will make your evening a success.

Incorporate Vigorous Exercise

How much you like to exercise is a question on Match.com.au for more reasons than just matching people who both like to jog. Exercise releases endorphins, which make you feel a lot of good things: happy, excited, confident, and yes, even horny. If you and your date could go for a jog or a quick rock climbing session that would be great, but even taking a brisk walk while you drink your after dinner coffee instead of sitting in the coffee shop can provide that natural high that will help her see you in a different light.

Start Earlier for Better Results

Sometimes she really does have an important meeting in the morning. If she didn’t there were was much chance that the two of you would hit it off, a woman might schedule your date the night before some big interview, meeting, or other function because she thought she’d be home in plenty of time to sleep. If you have a late date, then she’s put in a hard position: stay out, have a good time, and have sex with you, or get the job she wants or be well rested before her big day of traveling?

Whatever she’s doing, most women won’t risk throwing off their whole schedule for a one night stand. If your date is earlier she could have time to take an extra couple of hours with you and still be ready for whatever the world throws at her tomorrow.

Make the Big Romantic Gesture

Top reviews of online dating sites show that romance is out and hot sex is in. This isn’t a terrible thing, actually; it means that if you’re willing to go the extra mile, she’ll be so stunned and flattered that you’ll earn major points just that easily. It says “big romantic gesture”, but in this day and age bringing her some daises when you pick her up and then pulling the waiter aside at the restaurant to ask him to bring your date a slice of cake when dinner is done can be all it takes to seem amorous.

Let Her Take the Lead

A lot of men think that if they want to hook up they need to be the dominant one. It can’t hurt, but at the same time, it’s not actually required… and some women really like it to be the other way. Once your interest is clear, don’t chase her too much. Let her come to you. Women are used to being fawned over; play it cool and she’ll be so surprised she’ll have to have you.

No Cell Phone Zone

Sometimes all it takes to foster intimacy is restricting Internet access. Have her put her phone face down on the table (match it with yours) and the first person who picks it up loses and has to pay a penalty. A good option is to say the person who loses picks up the check. This way when the bill arrives you can snatch up your phone and then joke about your weakness while paying for the meal (which you were going to do anyway) and laughing.