In this modern day and age, you can imagine how a guy who prides himself on his intelligence can stand out. And to a lady seeking someone who she can have a conversation with? A guy who boasts a wide-ranging library will be head and shoulders above dudes who can’t string together a text message. When interacting on an online dating site, books are a great conversation starter. There are some good reasons for this.

Women Want Men Who They Can Bond With

That much is obvious, and true for guys as well. Do the interests on her dating profile tend toward the intellectual or literary? Then you can see why presenting yourself as well-read will attract her eye. Settle in and read over her dating site profile. What kinds of books is she interested in? This will let you sharpen your focus.

You can, of course, try to present yourself as a renaissance man with lots of literary interests. But when starting a chat with someone who has a specific curiosity or passion, it’s best to brush up on that topic. Are most of the books on her list are in the fantasy genre? Read up on the basics. That means finding out what books considered a must-read in the category. Same applies if she’s into sci-fi, romance, non-fiction, or whatever.

Pretending to be More Informed than You Are

To state the obvious, it’s much easier to actually read the books than to fake it. Lots of classic literature is available for free on the internet. With e-readers so prevalent and affordable, you can expand your own reading list without much trouble. That means you won’t have to bluff your way through conversations. Good relationships start with honesty. It’ll be awkward later when she finds out you’re not as well-read as you presented yourself to be. And believe us, she will find out.

Still, you’re a busy man. Even if you have the interest, you’re not able to read every single fantasy/sci-fi/romance book ever written. The best way to fake having a good basis in a genre is to brush up on the basics with a quick web search.

If you’re about to message her on the dating site, look up the books she lists online. Wikipedia is a good general resource for plot summaries and basic details about a given book. Wikipedia can also tell you about any famous controversies or news about that a book. You still want to stick to sites that don’t rely on user edits for information, though. Always look up other sources so you don’t want to make an ass of yourself. Don’t trust an eighth grader’s joke edit that says the author of “To Kill a Mockingbird” was Seymour Butts.

You’re in luck, though. People love to write about and discuss books. For the classics, there are sites with in-depth study guides for frantic students. For contemporary books, a quick Google search will let you read over book critics’ reviews. Read a few of these to put together your own thoughts. Or, check out what people say on a site like Goodreads to get a sense of the general sentiment.

A warning if you are faking it, though. It’s best to move the conversation elsewhere as soon as possible when it comes to something you haven’t read. You don’t want to dig yourself in too deep. You’ll be safe to use it as an ice-breaker to start a conversation on the dating app. Don’t take it further than that.

But remember, there is a much better alternative to faking it. If you haven’t read her favorite book, she will love to tell you about it herself. Figure out the genre, and ask some smart, relevant questions. Often, good questions are better than loud opinions.